Apartment hunting: 25 is the new cougar, I'm full of myself, and I sound like a bitch.

These are all things that have been reinforced by my Craigslist connections this week.

But let me back up.
In my search for the perfect (or perfect for now) apartment I naturally went to the greatest Internet community of all, Craigslist. I posted a "housing wanted" message entitled "California girl seeks home in the windy city." Yes, I got some pervs. But I also got some pretty funny messages. One message informed me that "You aren't all that. Get over yourself." To which I responded, "Your mom would beg to differ." Now let me openly admit that my posting maybe is a little braggadocio, but it's a sales pitch. Nobody wants to live with some who seems like a Debbie Downer, so I can totally understand how I come off as pompous. Also, I googled the guy's e-mail who sent that message to me, and he's a total racist and homophobe so I don't feel bad making jokes about his mother.
Another e-mail I enjoyed simple read "You sound like a bitch." Now as I admitted- pompous? Yes. Narcissistic? Probably. But bitchy? I didn't really think so. I wanted to e-mail this person back something like, "Really? 'Cause you sound awesome!" but then I would have proved them right about the bitchiness, so I respectfully stayed silent.

So I met with some potential roomies and thought I had found a place. It's in Lincoln Park at Diversey and Lincoln- nice and close to my friends, and super cheap at just $315 a month. I went over and met one of the roommates and just had to meet the other two and get the okay, which I was assured I would get. Well then I get a text today saying that the other two roommates (age 20 and 21) didn't want to live with me because I'm too old. Seriously? Twenty five is too old now?! I mean, I'd understand if I were a mature 25-year-old, say someone with any of the following: a job, a steady relationship, the urge to "settle down" or things of that nature. But I'm not. Blerg.
So now I'm back to square one. Still without a job, an apartment, a steady boyfriend, but at least I'm fun. Also, not a bitch. Honest.

Can we talk about how much I hated "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"?

They say movies require us to suspend disbelief or judgment in exchange for the promise of entertainment. Maybe that was my problem with The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Except I feel like I'm pretty good at suspending disbelief; just look at my love life. Oh no, that's called denial. Oh, wait, no, people apparently call that "love." Anyway.
From the first scenes I was scoffing. I found the hospital dialogue to be especially forced and trite. And those accents. I understand that they were supposed to be in New Orleans, but then why didn't the daughter (played rather dully by Julia Ormond), who was also raised there, have a southern accent? My suspension of disbelief was immediately broken.
That left me to sit through the next THREE hours of the movie mentally tacking every thing I hated. From the random blind clockmaker story (which although matched the feel and philosophy of the movie made zero plot advancement) to the inane amount of time recounting events ("and if she had just left one minute earlier, and if he has not stopped for that. . .") I sincerely hated this movie.
Now, let me explain this. Did I hate the movie? OH GOD, YES. Do I think it was a bad movie? No. I get it. Sweeping cinematography, big name actors in period costumes and lots of make up, an original storyline- I understand how people liked this movie. Apparently the folks over at the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences loved it, as it has been nominated for 13 Oscar's.
But I must admit that both Cate Blanchett and Brad Pitt did look especially lovely in this film. From Blanchett's young days as a dancer to Pitt's days in the 1960's (ladies, see: Pitt riding a motorcycle with aviator sunglasses on) the Hollywood starlets were breathtakingly beautiful.

So, if you have an afternoon to kill and can buy into what this movie is selling you, by all means, see this film. If you're like me and have a tendency to laugh at inappropriate times when you're feeling skeptical, then skip The Curious Case. Or see it and then post a ranting blog about how much you hated it. Check and check.

News Break: Kate has made an actual decision

If you know me, you know that I can be indecisive. Especially if you've ever tried to pick a restaurant to eat at or a movie to see with me, where you've undoubtedly heard me say, "Well, I don't know, what do you want to do?" Then we'll stand there forever in apathy.
But if you know me well you also know that despite the chaotic look of my life that I usually have a plan for the future. From my planned educational leave to work for AmeriCorps, to my plans of moving back to Chicago after graduation- I like having some kind of order in my life. That's why when my post-graduation plans fell spectacularly to pieces around me I started having some anxiety. The plan was: graduate, find the dream job (or in lieu of that, a job where I could move up towards that dream job), move to the city where the job was (Chicago, LA, San Francisco or Seattle) and start my "adult" life. Yeah, that's not happening. So what to do? Laying awake for nights on end worrying about it was starting to get really old. A decision had to be made. Since the old plan went out the window, I needed a new plan.
So here goes: In early February I'm going to pack up the G20 with all of my earthly belonging and move to Chicago. Sans job, sans apartment, but with gusto. I figure once I get there I can charm (*cough* not like that) my way into a temporary job as a waitress or barista or something. Then I'll spend my time in the trenches, working for a living, until I do eventually find that dream job, or something close enough.
Is this plan crazy? Probably, but that's classic Woodward.
So if you're a Fresno friend and you're reading this (oh please, none of my friends read this) then get ready for yet another "Kate's Going Away" party. And if you're a Chicago friend, pray that I find a job so that in a few weeks I'm not crashing on your couch.

If you're changing the name because other people already have it, then why aren't you at least being creative?

Yes, I'm already changing the name of my blog.
I find blogging to be a fairly self indulgent form of writing, and it would make sense that others would also recognize that and also call their blogs "An exercise in narcissism." So, in an attempt to be original I have stolen Paul Simon lyrics for my blog title. If you got the reference, hey- you're cool! If not, then let me assure you I haven't already started in on the incoherent ramblings. Well, not incoherent ramblings of my own, at least.

Okay, but what's the point?

Right? Yes, you may be asking yourself, "Kate, other than the fact that you've found another outlet to talk about yourself, what's point of this whole thing, and why should I care?"
1. The point: As anyone who has talked to me for more than two minutes in the last three months knows, I'm looking for a job. In this eternal search I'm coming across lots of posting that are asking for writing samples beyond press releases and newsletter articles. Other than the typical social networking pages I didn't have much else to reference except a few short Yelp reviews and the like. So here I am. I'm trying to get to a place where I can write quickly, with wit and direction, and this is going to serve as that outlet.
2. Why should you care? Well, you probably don't. But I'm hoping I can maybe make you laugh every now and again, maybe make you think in even rarer cases, and if not, then at least keep you up on my current ramblings and going-ons.
3. Yes, I really do love talking about myself.

So expect posts on things I think are funny, things that make me crazy, things I hate and all of the other things that make up the world of Kate.